This Week's Topic:

[twopoint]

Hi!

Question: How long does it take after you've edited and posted a fic to be able to re-read it without feeling like you're going to throw up?

(I'm seriously emetophobic, so typing the words 'throw up' is very hard for me, but no other phrase comes close to expressing my feelings on this matter.)

Comments

[two-point.livejournal.com]

I want both!!!

And then I'll decide between the two.

[questails.livejournal.com]

Then I shall give both, but I don't tell you which is which!

ANSWER THE ONE: Having now read a not-insubstantial amount of your fic, I can use any one of several methods of statistical analysis to show, with better than 99.8% certainty, that you aren't capable of posting something worthy of.... you know.... when reading it later. (I also despise doing... that, so I know what you mean.). Therefore you don't have to worry about it.

ANSWER THE OTHER: It's a trick question with no real answer; because the only vantage point from which you can look back on a work with complete satisfaction is that of a better one. E.g., you re-read something from ten years ago or yesterday; and you can look on it kindly because you learned from its flaws and wrote something better. It was a stepping stone, and as such, you feel like you've gone forward and no longer want to... you know... over those errors or weaknesses.

[two-point.livejournal.com]

I once subscribed to a mailing list wherein we had to use the letter v. to stand for . . .you know. My mother still v. screens movies for me. And if, god forbid, a kid in the barn does . . .you know, I am out of there so fast. Give me arterial bleeds, give me compound fractures, give me anything other than that.

1. Praise from Leos is the most substantial praise there is. Thank you. Whether this is the Leo answering, or not, I'm tacking this to my wall and staring at it.

2. Your are absolutely right. If we were contented with a finished work, we would have no desire to do more or better. Disgust is a useful and instrumental motivator.

How often do you go back and spend time with a finished visual piece?

[questails.livejournal.com]

*sadly agrees* I can handle a bleeding animal very calmly. I've seen what a dog's leg looks like after a steel-jacketed slug has been through the femur approximately (per the vet) a week prior. (The dog lived, and kept his leg, although it was rather shorter afterward.) If someone does.. that.. however, I have to flee the room, trying not to do so as well.

1. Now, you've assumed that this was the Leo answer; what if it was the unvarnished truth, hmmm? Either way you most certainly should print it out, prominently label it 'THE TRUTH' and put it someplace where you can see it as you're deciding whether to post a story or not.

2. Who but a Leo says things in such a way to imply that there is no other right answer? Still, this one could also be the truth: I'm not really a sunshine-out-of-the-ass sort, nor am I an egomaniac, therefore yes, I will tell anyone that I get disgusted with my art on a regular basis, and it helps. I am trying to train myself to use that disgust to spring off to something better, not as an excuse to drop my pencils and go play Castlevania. (I've done both, certainly.)

I frequently flinch over old pieces, scrolling past them as I hunt down a file to open in Photoshop. However it's quite rare for me to pick up an old piece again; I either solve and finish something, or drop it forever. I don't know if this is a good habit or not. Being solved-and-finished doesn't exempt a piece from making me want to... you know... but in retrospect, I have to admit that I enjoy the dichotomy: I look at it, I wince over the errors, but often I remember what it was about it that made me happy when I was drawing it, which feels nice. I want that feeling again, so I start to draw something... and the cycle repeats.

[thrihyrne.livejournal.com]

Disgust is a useful and instrumental motivator.

LOLOL. Why, yes it is. Self-disgust and 'OMG, how could I ever have written that and let it see the light of day?' and 'Why haven't I learned more?' all go together for me. I think with so many of my stories, especially ones I was reasonably proud of, I've posted, and walked away.

[sorry to intrude here on the thread; I was fascinated to see what people would say and that comment jumped out at me as such a truism, I had to say something.]

[two-point.livejournal.com]

Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes. And yes. This is what I've decided to do with the 95% of self-indulgent fic I've written. It's not up to my standards -- hell, the posted stuff isn't up to my standards, but I'm going to post it and lock it and if someone is THAT interested, I'll let them try it out. Read at your own risk and all that.

I have too much just sitting here doing nothing and most of it is all fannish, so I can't warp it into an original without a lot of re-writing.